I really ought to stop reading con reports

[figmo]

It rarely fails to happen:

1. I go to a con.
2. I feel good for having gone to the con and having had a good time.
3. I read the con reports, see myself totally absent, and get really depressed.

This continuously amazes me, given that I've done some things over the years I thought were highly conspicuous. I once coordinated the smuggling of a sousaphone into OVFF. I have run cons. I have done concerts complete with costume changes and choreography. I've tried to make a sanitary napkin with wings fly while on stage. I've brought an insufferably cute dog to cons.

This time even the dog didn't get mentioned.

Comments

[filkerdave.livejournal.com]

Do you read conreps for egoboo or to see what people thought of the con?

[figmo.livejournal.com]

I read them to see what I might have missed and yeah, I care about being cared about.

I care most about how I felt about the con. If twenty gazillion people wrote scathing reports about a con and I had a good time at it, do you think I'd care about their opinions (other than feeling bad that they had a bad time)? On the other hand, if others enjoyed a con and I didn't, I feel cheated.

This didn't happen with either of the GAFilks I've attended, but there was a con where I had a miserable time, said so in my journal, and instead of concom members trying to make it better, they started attacking me. I no longer write conreps about that con if I go because the only reason I go to it any more is to see others who are there.

[pbristow.livejournal.com]

"I read them to see what I might have missed and yeah, I care about being cared about." Yep, that's it exactly. I read conreps as a way to extend the experience of the con, by getting a glimpse of other people's experiences of it... But I'm dead chuffed by the rare, occasional time I get mentioned, and always a bit disappointed if I'm not. I'm mostly used to being invisible and forgettable in day-to-day life, but I always hope to be a little more visible/memorable at 'cons. 'Cos, like, that's where I do all my best stuff, y'know? =:o}

Regarding the "con where I had a miserable time, [and] said so":

Hmmm... This may not be pertinent to your case (I don't know at what stage your offered your critique), but as a generality: There's an important phenomenon to bear in mind here. The natural time for people to want to comment on how good or bad a con was (or indeed to offer small criticisms whilst applauding the overall whole) is immediately after the 'con. Unfortunately (as I'm sure you know first hand! =:o} ) this is precisely the time when the concom are poorest equipped to take any criticisms calmly or objectively. They're exhausted! They may have thoroughly enjoyed the 'con, or they may have been through hell, but either way their experience will have been very different to the experience of the general congoers, because it was the final frantic burst of energy at the end of a long run of hard slog, and right now all they want to do is sleep... Except that, like you, they can't resist reading the conreps!

And, of course, its their *baby* you're talking about. No mother* takes kindly to criticism of her baby. (What's the average gestation period for filk con... About 18 months? =:o} )

*(Well, almost no mother... )

[figmo.livejournal.com]

I guess I'm the weirdo who likes criticism. I was brought up to believe you only criticize someone you think can improve. If you don't offer criticism, it means you've written the person off.

With that in mind, if someone has constructive criticism ("You suck" is not constructive; "You suck because..." is), I like it.

One of the nice things about the Consonance concom is we are pretty blunt with each other with the understanding that we do it because we care. If someone tells me something's off, I accept it. I figure I must be doing something right because people keep coming back to work on the concom. The attrition we've had is due to people moving out of the area due to the sucky economy.

[filkerdave.livejournal.com]

Not being mentioned at a conrep isn't a sign that people don't care -- it's a sign that you didn't get mentioned in the conrep. Lord knows I don't write everything down in my conreps; there are people I leave out all the time, there are thing I did that I really enjoyed at the time that I leave out all the time.

A conrep is, at best, fragmentary.

And hey, it could be worse. People could mention you in a nasty context ;)

[figmo.livejournal.com]

Good point. :-)