I need a sanity check, please

[figmo]

Here's the situation:

You're in a large, open room, working side-by-side with someone. A person from the other end of the building comes by and starts casually chatting, initially with just the other person you're working with side-by-side. Someone comes out of an office nearby and joins in the conversation.

The questions:

Is it rude for you, the other person in the open area, to also join in on the conversation?

Is it rude for you to acknowledge the conversation that had been held out in the open when chatting with the first participant later on?

or...

Is it rude for one of the people involved in the conversation to randomly exclude you even though they were holding the conversation right under your nose?

Please advise.

Comments

[catalana.livejournal.com]

If it is a casual conversation, I think there is no problem with your joining in, given those circumstances. I'm pretty sure that this is what you're talking about, so no worries.

However, I have to jump in and add a caveat to what lots of people are saying here.

If it is not a casual conversation, you have to use your discretion. Yeah, yeah, I understand hte point about "if it's held in a public place, of course you can join in because it's public" or "if it's in a public place, there should be no problem acknowledging what you heard." But sometimes it's more important to think about whether what you're doing is right, rather than whether what you're doing is wrong.

So if you hear someone tearfully confiding she's experienced a death in the family to someone nearby, sure you're perfectly able to join in or say something to her later. It's allowed. But if you have any sensitivity at all, you'll stop to consider how well you know the person, whether they really meant it to be overheard (since they may not have been thinking clearly) and so forth. You aren't at fault if you join in, but maybe it's not the best thing to do.

This, of course, is one of the things that makes human interactions so complicated - there isn't a single set of rules to follow. *sigh*

In any case, I suspect you did fine - I wouldn't worry about it.