Flat farking broke

[figmo]

Someone sucked all the money out of my savings and checking accounts today. My E*Trade account is about to get seized by the state for back taxes they think I owe (my accountant is still working on the returns for the last three years due to discrepancies on E*Trade's part during my "day trading" days). I suspect it's the looney guy from the CA Franchise Tax Board.

I don't know what to do. How the hell am I supposed to pay bills when I can't write checks or put the funds in for the folks who are supposed to auto-suck them? Do I need a tax lawyer? Do I need a bankruptcy lawyer?

I'm terrified.